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Estonian conquest of Iraq

created by montecarlo

(idea) by montecarlo (2.9 hr) (print)   ?   (I like it!) 2 C!s Sat Mar 15 2003 at 15:37:07

Not only children of Lucy

We are all originally natives of Africa, being descendants of Lucy, the lady who is reportedly our primeval African Mom. This is quite interesting. But what is even more interesting is to learn that in some future time we -- the entire future population of Earth, including Iraq -- will additionally be citizens of the minuscule Republic of Estonia (pop. 1.3 million).

The citizenship laws of Estonia define Estonian citizens as "persons who were Estonian citizens before June 21, 1940, and their descendants". June 21, 1940 refers to the date of the Russ- , sorry, Soviet occupation of Estonia and means that all descendants of the original Estonian nationals are automatically guaranteed citizenship, while later "immigrants" (= Russians who flooded the country during a Soviet russification scheme) are not automatically citizens, but have to apply for citizenship.

A matter of statistics

But this also means that when "original" Estonians interbreed with other nationals, and exhibit a reasonably high fertility, then in due time virtually everybody will be endowed with Estonian citizenship. Here is an extreme example, to illustrate the point:

Let us say that an Estonian (man or woman, but descended from a person who was an Estonian citizen before 1940), marries 4 times, each time with a national of a different country (say Germany, France, the UK and the US) and has 3 children in each marriage. These 12 children are all descendants of a person who was an Estonian citizen before 1940 and are thus automatically Estonian citizens.

These 12 Estonian citizens breed in turn with persons of different nationalities (child #1 with a Chinese, a Bulgarian, a South African, and a Mexican, child #2 with a Thai, an Indian, an Israeli, an Iraqi, child #3 with ... etc, etc.). All of these third generation children are of course Estonian citizens as well, ready to transmit their citizenship onto their offspring in turn.

Peaceful conquest of Iraq

Eventually the original Estonian "blood" will be diluted to homeopathic proportions, but this will not make the individuals, for example the residents of Iraq, any less citizens of the Republic of Estonia.

True, not everybody has several international marriages with multiple children in each. But the Flow of Time is just as effective as frenzied breeding, in the Millennial perspective. So in the final analysis Iraq will become Estonian, by peaceful statistical means. No warlike actions of George W Bush can change this predestined outcome. Doesn't he have competent advisors who could have told him, saving billions for the ailing US economy?


printable version
chaos

The United States should go to war with Iraq The United States should not go to war with Iraq The United States should go to war with everyone Iraq
The Danish conquest of England Democrats struggling to gain control of pirate demographic Russification Citizenship
War on Iraq 2003 Homeopathic statistical analysis Offspring
Lucy Support the Troops 1940 fertility
Soviet Estonia Violence never solved anything War in Iraq, pacifism, and the real world
George W Bush's Iraq Press Conference, March 6, 2003 UK predestined Occupation
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