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designated fuck

created by brainwave

(person) by brainwave (4.6 mon) (print)   ?   (I like it!) 1 C! Fri Jun 23 2000 at 20:02:53

I first heard this term used my freshman year of college. Some names have been changed to protect the innocent and the not-so-innocent alike:

Scene: Anonymous Female Friend and I are on our way to a party with Random Guy and a group of people. Anonymous and I quietly fall behind the group so I can ask her a quick question.

Me: So who is the new boyfriend?
Anonymous Female Friend: Oh, you mean Random Guy?
Me: yeah.
Anonymous Female Friend: He isn't my boyfriend, he is my designated fuck.
Me: ... (see the discussion under ... of anime-based video game dialogue)
Anonymous Female Friend: You know... I brought him along so that I will have someone to go home with after I get completely smashed.
Me: WHAT!!! (loud enough that everyone else looks back at us for a second)
Anonymous Female Friend: Well I wouldn't want to end up fucking someone I don't know. They might have a disease or be a creep or a stalker or a frat boy and I would be so wasted I wouldn't know it until tomorow morning. I am reasonably certain that this guy is clean and that he will use a condom. He won't get too emotionaly attached or get weird on me. This way I can completely let go at the party without too much risk.
Me: You mean he knows about this arangement?!?!
Anonymous Female Friend: Yeah... well kinda... I just looked at him seductively and told him that if he looked after me at the party tonight there might be something in it for him afterwards.
Me: Wow that is pretty good logic. You scare me sometimes. You know of course that I would have looked after you tonight if you had asked me.
Anonymous Female Friend: Yeah, but you would get weird on me.
Me: Well yeah probably, but I meant that I would have done it without the promise of sex.
Anonymous Female Friend: Yeah, I know but wanted you to relax and enjoy the party too. Besides you need to be out there chasing those women tonight.

Of course she knew that I was not the type to be out there chasing women, but we rejoined the group and went to the party.

As far as I know the arrangement worked out to be benificial for all involved.

Compare/Contrast: fuck buddy, friends with perks, best friend with benefits, friends who fuck


printable version
chaos

... The pickup-lines that actually work Friends who fuck The kinds of friends I can change my clothes in front of
Fingerfucking your best friend Do you want to cuddle in my tent? I'm angry, and tired, and sad, and I just don't want to deal with it right now, so fuck off fuck buddy
fumu Whiskey flavored condom I am Ford's dog anime
df You bitch! You slut! You whore! Falling in love with your best friend Sex with your best friend
Fuck Your Buddy living sex toy Veronica loves manipulating her vagina until she explodes Chinks don't fuck
Mile High Club Platonic friends are always right Hints for bachelors expecting a visit from an intimate lady friend Urea
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