Hospital Corners

Or: An Anal Retentive's Guide to Making a Bed

Few things satisfy a control freak like a bed made so tight you can bounce a quarter off it. In the spirit of such rigid self-expression, I now present to you the product of many years of toil in the hospitality industry...how to make hospital corners.


If these directions were too confusing, just ask your mom. She'll be impressed by your initiative. If you don't have a mom, ask your favorite Martha Stewart wannabe.

As a side note, here's an anal expulsive's guide to making a bed: Fuck authority and subvert the dominant paradigm by sleeping in a barn or a bathtub or a hammock, or, better yet, by not sleeping at all.

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