Near Matches
Ignore Exact
Everything
2
10 perfectly good reasons not to exorcise
(
fiction
)
by
Glowing Fish
Tue Oct 26 2010 at 19:00:42
That sound in the attic? Just
squirrels
. Or maybe rats, which is scary, but it is hardly
supernatural
.
Those
bloodstains
on the carpet that won't seem to fade no matter how much washing? I think the more likely answer involves giving glasses of
cranberry juice
to
rambunctious children
The rattling and moaning in the house? Well, that is natural with an older house, in an area where the temperature changes a lot over night. Just
settling
.
The
apparition
our teenage daughter saw in the mirror, looking over her shoulder? We all know
adolescence can be a very stressful time
. Maybe you want to call a psychologist.
Okay, all the dishes levitating at once...okay, someone is a real prankster. But lots of things can be done with wires. Talk to your kids about doing that type of stuff, especially when
Aunt Mabel
with the
heart condition
is over visiting.
Look honey, we are good,
mainline protestants
, and I don't think the
Episcopalian Priest
even believes in exorcism. He has to do the
rummage sale
so that the youth group can take that tour to Montreal, anyway.
Okay, okay. I have been reading...well, its like
Hamlet
said: "
There are more things in Heaven and Earth
"... it could be, um, a
quantum probability
thing resonating with the superstructure of the
microtubules
in our brain...
Anyway, it could be
poltergeist
. You can't exorcise those. Only
demons
.
That is it, we are selling the house. I don't care about explanations. I just want out.
Honey, if we really, really try...we can move around the world, from place to place, so there is never more than a few hours of darkness that we have to live through. I have cashed in our savings, we are buying houses in
Whitehorse
and
Tierra Del Fuego
. Don't ask questions. Just put your things in the car. And bring out the torches.
Ten Years of Terror: The 2010 Halloween Horrorquest
10 perfectly good reasons not to exercise
Ten Years of Terror: The 2010 Halloween Horrorquest
So I hired an axe murderer: A strikethrough-ridden look at reference checking
Tell me a story about being really undead
Poltergeist
to exorcise or not to exorcise?
Then the walls started to bleed again and I just KNEW I'd be the one cleaning it up.
Exorcism Hotline
The Lie-Detecting Beasts of the Great Stalingrad Tractor Factory
I can make you howl. And vice versa. Let's get down to business.
There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy
exorcise
cactaur
Normand Brissette
Through the eyes of a stranger
mainline protestant
October 26, 2010
It is something very shameful. Please contact me again if I can be of further service.
cranberry juice
Reason #47: Like Dawn with 4,000 subtle shades of red, you are inspiration
St. Mary's Rummage Sale
Nodes of "E2 Canada"
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