As many of you well know,
E2 is doomed. It has suffered the
slings and arrows of outrageous fortune and somehow landed under the stewardship of
Lord Brawl, a
feckless Canadian! Can you imagine? The graves of
Holland, Michigan burst with the
unquiet dead. Ye who have broken the faith must flee from their vengeful claws!
Our new improved
kinder gentler machine gun hand, LB, has opened the floor to the unwashed masses to apply for content
editorship. How utterly
distasteful. It smacks of that liberal
multiculturalism pap they sling up North. Indeed, is it not just a exercise in giving us enough
rope with which to hang ourselves? I have turned my wary trained eye on the entire
spectacle and I can come to only one conclusion:
E2 must submit to my will, lest it BURN.
As always, during my enlightened reign as
Pontifex Maximus, Lord High
Space Pope of E2, I have lamented the stuttering lopsided
gait of our beloved webhole, as one would pity an
enthusiastic dog with a penchant for crotch sniffing. I say to thee:
THE HOUR OF THE SNIFFED CROTCH HATH PASSED!
We must rise above, brothers and sisters! We must take the
Interweb by its electric collar and dash its brains against the insides of its metaphorical skull, screaming "E2 is what this is all about!" No longer will we sit back and tentatively
gauge the depth of the kiddy pool that is the Web. We will become
lifeguards, ever ready to leap from our whitewashed tower and save the drowning intellectual!
ALL GLORY TO THE HIVEMIND!
We are
special. We are
unique. We are the
penultimate use of the premiere development of the
Cold War. Will this dream die? Will we look back at this glorious age and say that it died on our
watch? That we let it slip quietly beneath the boiling waves of the uninformed and microwave fed?
I SAY NAY!
With this in mind, I respectfully submit the only editorship
application borne of a
fire in the belly run rampant, a fevered imagination that cannot fathom the end of its
favorite playground, a zealotous soul that would rather die than let
attrition and
laziness damn something special.
I will be your Joan of Arc. I will lead you to Victory.
They would ask me what 5 writeups epitomize to me what's special about E2?
Would you ask a mother to chose which child she would see live over the other? Would you question the
erstwhile captain of a lifeboat as he shrugged off the struggling arms of the men in the water around him? You would? O.K. then.
1)
Mr Loo
2)
What I'm trying to say is that I may have unconsciously plagiarized this
3)
The 1925 Serum Run to Nome
4)
Supper with Konzee
5)
I had a brother, once
6)
Rumi-chan speaks the truth
Why 6? To prove a point. The point? That no matter what you love about e2, no matter what
metric you judge it by, there is always another
wonder just round the corner, down the next pipelink, waiting in
New Writeups... it's a dreamland in here, made up of people, just like you. They'll be talking about stuff like this in a
hundred years from now. I want us to be a footnote to history.
"List 2 or 3 writeups (your own) with which you're most pleased."
1)
Leader of the Free World
2)
Bugs go to JayBonci
3)
Who would win in a knife fight between Webster 1913 and Vulgar Tongue 1811 on the moon?
Why? Because they made people "
feel". 'Cause that's the real problem. If you don't "
feel" E2, 100 years of grammar school isn't gonna help.
Let's be
realistic. I am not your model
copy editor. I'll bet that there are whole boatload of typos and fractured sentences and half finished thoughts in this node. Is it
important for people to correct those? Of course! Should that be
all an editor does? A million times
No. The best editor you can have as an author is one that feels the same
passion as you do, and that will stand on the deck of the most
waterlogged of ships with you. Can you save them all, noders and writeups alike? No, but you can
die trying.
The question I would ask is "Whats the single most important node that you will write for e2?"
The answer for everyone is "the
next one".
How do I know that?
It's my fucking job to know.