Here's the stuff we found when you searched for "I heard a report that our advancing troops came across a group of three ragged Iraqi soldiers, who had been living under a highway bridge. They surrendered without offering any resistance."

• And if terrorists wanted to communicate secretly, mightn't they just do so by collaborating on a 'draft' here at e2? Can the NSA check on our drafts? Who knows? Inquiring minds want to know, Jay!
• Those of us who are thieves starve without a joker in our deck.
• Am I the only one who walks alone under moonlight without fear?
• I should have been a pair of ragged claws scuttling across the floors of silent seas.
• They had been expecting me
• And only those who had been there knew the whole truth.
• And then they came for me, but the bridge would not ignite.
• I really came to understand that they were just real people who wanted to live real lives and be treated equally as opposed to, for example, wanting to destroy us.
• Some of Us Had Been Threatening Our Friend Colby
• The flowers of our love had died under the hot sun of time
• As if we had been sitting next to each other for years
• Our way or the highway
• the saxophonist under the bridge
• And then wings sprouted from the space between my shoulders where my wings had once been
• play dumb
• Words are the mirrors of our discontents merely; they contain all the huge unhatched eggs of the world's sorrows.
• Caregiver Support Group, take three
• The Three Oppressions That Came To This Island
• Living well is only the best revenge if they don't have a fuckable sibling
• Drivers who think they are Neo
• People who argue, using terms they refuse to define
• An American Testament has been written, and our Ten Commandments are as follows
• The Bridge Across Forever
• though they could speak and had beautiful voices
• How does the Military Selective Service Act apply to individuals who have had a sex change?
• The law, in its majestic equality, forbids the rich as well as the poor to sleep under bridges, to beg in the streets, and to steal bread.
• I had been hungry all the years
• Crazy mixed up kids who stopped living and became zombies
• The gritty, solitary beauty of riding a bike across the 59th St. bridge at dawn
• Three Golden-Tongued Knights, Whom No One Could Refuse Whatsoever They Might Ask
• cat haters
• Bridge Across the Water
• They killed our Lord
• The Little Girl that Had Been Dead for a Hundred Years
• Who's been messin' with my laser?
• If it had been able to, the light would have smiled
• and then, one morning, I realised I had been an adult for a while
• It's been almost three weeks since yesterday.
• we're part of something bigger than any one of us. i just feel lucky to have been chosen.
• They Came To America
• Who Came First
• Would Jesus Christ give money to every bum he came across?
• When you see smoke under the Golden Gate Bridge
• If we had a more developed tailbone, would we wag our tail?
• Presidents of the United States who had not previously held elected office
• The dead eat hope. We had none to give them, so they were pretty emaciated by the end.
• I know who goes to that group, and that's why I don't go
• First They Came
• When they cut through the mountains to lay highways
• They bombed our chip shops!
• It is only in marriage with the world that our ideals can bear fruit: divorced from it, they remain barren.
• They knew what our pain would be.
• Among strangers who will say so many things to fill our ears
• They own the pack while we play the three card trick
• Children who are born blind still smile when they are happy
• Who are "they" anyway?
• Women who don't realize they're pregnant until they give birth
• A million feet in military lockstep across the new millennium's bridges
• Girls who tell you they have a boyfriend
• What do girls think about guys who think about what other people think about girls and what they do?
• God is a pretty girl across the bar who smiles and waves in your direction; and you think she is waving at you
• They are angry and they have been lied to
• Like hands on a clock tell time without thinking about how long it's been
• This is a story I wish I had been able to write. Hope you like it.
• What if I had never met you? How much the poorer would my life have been.
• you've been living in a dream world
• Three truths across the sky
• a secret cabal of squirrels has been slowly terraforming the world behind our backs
• I coulda had class. I coulda been a contender.
• If we ran this back an infinite number of times across infinite existences our souls would still never connect, so don't regret.
• Bloody Footprints Across the Bridge of Broken Glass
• How many lives could have been saved had we just said "Please" more often?
• Three Came Home
• Under the Bridge
• The Spy Who Came in from the Cold
• Jean-Paul Sartre and the student who came to him for advice.
• The theory that Venus came into our solar system relatively recently
• in the still hollows under bridges
• a man who had fallen among thieves
• The Girl Who Had Everything
• The Iraq Study Group Report
• To John Bartlett, Who Had Sent Me a Seven Pound Trout
• They had built the Unrecordable Sculpture again last night
• If the field of AI had tried building footballers rather than chess players, how might it be different today?
• the dexterity of one who had smoked for years
• The dam under the bridge
• I never wanted to burn any bridges. But I did want to light some fires.
• We left our dead where they lay and the sand preserved them
• Who owns our writeups?
• The Incredibly Strange Creatures Who Stopped Living and Became Mixed-Up Zombies
• our moonlight is silverfish swimming for sun-bred children. they dive off the porch, shirtless, bronze throats smiling with newborn gills.
• Homes for Our Troops
• Our hearts were hard, but they were warm
• the stars would weep if they knew of our existence
• all of our suffering is nothing more than resistance to this very moment
• No dreamer’s diagram so symmetrical and so faultless on paper can guarantee anything. Only we can guarantee, only our behavior under pressure.
• Our Father Christmas, who art at the North Pole
• Who's Rating our Games?
• i've heard that's how they did it in ancient egypt
• Song for Three Soldiers
• You say "the internet" but you mean "the world wide web"
• The problem with people who think life is inexpressibly beautiful is that they so often try to express it anyway
• Do not, under any circumstances, touch this button
• Girls who go home with you when they don't even know your name
• Thinking you know more about computers than the tech you just called
• Three Brazilian Soldiers
• They die obscurely under assumed names
• For anybody who thinks they need to see a psychiatrist
• Guys who don't tell you they have a girlfriend
• Right-wing doesn't automatically mean racist
• To those who know who they are
• They who monitor the Internet
• I wish they made marshmallow cereal without the cereal
• Soldiers who wish to be a hero
• Living without a computer
• you have ghosts. where are they? are they so deep that the light cannot reach them? is there any such place?
• I thought ALL women looked for a wedding ring when they talked to ANY man
• These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease.
• If you had any balls, you'd say 'Oh, my God, what is that thing?' then scream and cut your mic.
• It would have been an excellent story but I had to get off the train
• To One who has been Long in City Pent
• Nobody wins the game of who has been hurt more
• Any woman who thinks she is pro-life should ask herself
• I wish I had been told what Schrödinger really meant
• The eyes of the dead may not blink, but they have been known to wander
• Life had been an opportunity lost
• I've been living my life half asleep
• Your Cause is Our Cause, and Any Cause is a Good Cause (e2poll)
• every statue in town came to life, but they'd been watching long enough to know better than to ever move
• our voices, once clarion, have been muted by time and mortgages
• What if Heraclides had never been born?
• What is Heraclides had never been born?
• I've been looking so long at these pictures of you that I almost believe that they are real
• Meanwhile, the PILOT, who has been laughing hysterically through the entire sequence, finally loses it. He falls out of his chair and bangs his head against the panel, causing the ship to lose control and crash into a nearby planet
• Our desire to remember has been fragmented into a thousand slices
• Any sufficiently nice person is indistinguishable from someone who likes you
• The real horror was not what had been redacted, but the reasons why.
• How many a dispute could have been deflated into a single paragraph if the disputants had dared to define their terms.
• Wedding invitations for people who have been divorced for years
• If you're not sure whether or not you've been had, then you've already been had.
• Our minds bend and twist in the wind, our bodies fall apart, and the ghosts we leave behind have only one question: Where Have You Been?
• Congratulations: you are living a life devoid of any serious problems
• war trophies for people who have never been to war
• had Orpheus been a gentleman
• Top 10 Reasons to Move to Canada Without Electing Any Of These Nitwits
• I want them to go out as unseen as they came
• The Child who came from an Egg
• water under the bridge
• He's been places they have not.
• Three times the Pale Rider came
• The Man Who Came to Dinner
• How They Came to Bunbury
• It was better before they came
• They came together so as to form one whole
• The Thief Who Came to Dinner
• What would aliens think of us if Everything was all they had?
• They want me for a focus group!
• What do you say to someone who has just had an abortion?
• She was thinking of a boy in California who had a couch and a job
• The Boy Who Had Everything
• When you had left our pirate fold
• remember who you were before you came here
• The Fun They Had
• They Had No Poet
• We had no bait but our tongues
• people who were not to be trifled with; people who would dance, and had no notion of walking
• The princess who climbed up a tree and came down a Queen
• I climbed the stairs behind him, without any reason to follow
• My life's got rags, my life's got riches. They've all been mixed together for so long it's hard to tell them apart.
• You will be advanced socially, without any special effort on your part
• The dead eat it always, but the living who eat it die slowly
• Advantaging all without disadvantaging any
• Who Are We Living For?
• They left the streets stained with blood, and their howling could be heard long after they were gone
• Opening a command prompt in Windows
• They were getting into riot gear as we sipped our wine
• Some of our best friends are three minutes long
• Let's hear that string part again, because I don't think they heard it
• The Story of Augustus who not have any Soup
• Maybe they heard you scream.
• They had left, but her mascara kept running
• To a beautiful woman without any ketchup

If you Log in you could create a "I heard a report that our advancing troops came across a group of three ragged Iraqi soldiers, who had been living under a highway bridge. They surrendered without offering any resistance." node. If you don't already have an account, you can register here.