Ah yes, the Big Ugly Yellow Thing.
At first glance, it may seem to the untrained eye that some
artiste had one too many
espressos and saw some refuse in a construction yard, and, in a fit of unparallelled misguidedness, decided to mash them all together and sell it to the
University of New Brunswick. The highly skilled engineer, of course, knows that it was probably more like
fifteen too many espressos. We can only hope that the resulting
caffeine shock prevented any other universities from being inflicted with their very own Big Ugly Yellow Things.
Anyway, the Big Ugly Yellow Thing, as it is known by pretty much everyone in the
UNB engineering department (no one seems to know its
real name, if it has one), is a vaguely
treelike structure made of various
construction trusses and
I-beams sticking out at 90- and 45-degree angles in odd places, and covered in now-
peeling yellow paint. I'm told that the purpose of the "art" is that it contains every type of construction truss; this is only
rumour, however.
The main
function of the Big Ugly Yellow Thing is twofold:
(A) To take up space in a
useless and
property-value-depreciating manner; and
(B) To provide the various
engineering societies an easily recognizable outdoor location for barbecues and the like.
Despite my inquiries to
upper-year students, I have been unable to find out what sort of
act of Dog led to the
acquisition of the Big Ugly Yellow Thing; it seems to have existed in the same spot longer than any current student can remember, and its
capital-M-Meaning has long since
faded into the mists. As your dutiful
interstellar personal servant, however, it is my duty to continue my
investigation, beginning with the professors (most of whom have been at UNB since before the aforementioned mists);
The Secret Will Be Uncovered!(tm)