Anal Cunt

Anal Cunt is a band with absolutely no musical or ethical redeeming values.  Their song titles, however, make lots of people laugh simply because of the "Someone wrote a song called WHAT?" value.  Yes, it's offensive.  Very much so. 

Here's all the discography I could find (darklyrics.com, amazon.com)--if you find more, /msg me.

Also--as of a few weeks ago, Anal Cunt is no more. yesno informs me that the band has broken up.

Major Discography

"Morbid Florist" (1993)

1. Some Songs
2. Song #5
3. Chump Change
4. Slow Song from Split 7"
5. Unbelieveable
6. Siege
7. Grateful Dead
8. I Don't Wanna Dance
9. Even More Songs
10. Radio Hit
11. Some More Songs
12. Morrissey
13. Song #6
14. Guy Lombardo
15. Untitiled

"Everybody Should Be Killed" (1994)

1. Some Songs
2. Some More Songs
3. Blur Including New H.C. Song
4. Even More Songs
5. Tim
6. Judge
7. Spin Cycle
8. Song #8
9. Pavorotti
10. Unbelievable
11. Music Sucks
12. Newest H.C. Song #1
13. Chiffon and Chips
14. Guy Smiley
15. Seth
16. 'Im not allowed to like A.C. any more since they signed to Earache'
17. A. EX. A Blur
18. G.M.O.T.R.
19. I'm Wicked Underground
20. Blur Including G
21. Shut UP Mike
22. Abomination of Unnecessarily Augmented Composition Monickers
23. Radio Hit
24. Loser
25. When I Think of True Punk Rock Bands. I Think of Nirvana and The Melvins
26. EddY Grant
27. MTV is My Source For New Music
28. Song Titles Are Fucking Stupid
29. Having To Make UP Song titles Sucks
30. 'Well You Know, Mean Gene...'
31. Song *5
32. Iron Funeral
33. Chapel of Gristle
34. Hellbent For Leatherman
35. Alcoholic
36. Chump Change
37. Slow Song From Split
38. Les Binks Hairstyle
39. Newest H.C. Song #2
40. Greatful Dead
41. Aging Disgracefully
42. Brutally Morbid Axe of Satan
43. Surfer
44. You Must Be Wicked Underground If You Own This
45. Choke Edge
46. Otis Sistrunk
47. Russty Knoife
48. Fred Bash
49. Guess Which 10 Of These Are Actual Song Titles
50. Our Band Is Wicked Sick (We Have The Flu)
51. Guy Le Fleur
52. Song #3
53. Empire Sandwich Shop
54. Morrisey
55. Selling Out By Having Song titles On his Album
56. Grindcore Is Very Terrifying
57. Song #6
58. Guy Lombardo

"Top 40 Hits" (1995)

1. Some Hits
2. Some More Hits
3. Pepe, The Gay Waiter
4. Even More Hits
5. M.J.C.
6. Flower Shop Guy
7. Living Colour Is My Favorite Black Metal Band
8. Lenny's In My Basement
9. Stayin Alive (Oi! version)
10. Benchpressing Effects On Kevin Sharp's vocals
11. Josue
12. Delicious Face Style
13. #19 To Go
14. 'Stealing Seth's Ideas' The New Book By John Chang
15. Morbid Dead Guy
16. Believe In The King
17. Dont Call Japanese Hardcore Japcore
18. Shut Up Mike, Pt 2
19. Hey, Aren't You Gary Spivey?
20. Breastfeeding Jim J. Bullock's Toenail Collection
21. Foreplay With A Tree Shredder
22. 2 Down 5 To Go
23. I Liked Earache Better When Dig Answered The Phone
24. Brain Dead
25. Newest H.C. Song #3
26. The Sultry Ways Of Steve Berger
27. Escape (The Pina Colada Song)
28. Lives Ruined By Music
29. Still A Freshman After All These Years
30. I'm Still Standing
31. Art Fag
32. John
33. Newest H.C. Song #4
34. Song #9 (Instrumental)
35. Cleft Plate
36. Theme From The A-Team
37. Old Lady Across The Hall With No Life
38. Shut Up Paul
39. Lazy Eye (Once a Hank, always a Hank)
40. American Woman

"40 More Reasons To Hate Us" (1996)

1. Face It. You're A Metal Band
2. Punching Joe Bonni's Face In
3. Kill Women
4. Steroids Guy
5. Everyone In Allston Should Be Killed
6. I Noticed That You're Gay
7. Dead. Gay. And Dropped
8. You Look Divorced
9. I Hope You Get Deported
10. Mike Mahan Has Gingivitis
11. Trapped
12. You're A Fucking Cunt
13. Phyllis Is An Old Annoying Cunt
14. Al Stankus Is Always On The Phone With His Bookie
15. Bill Scott's Dumb
16. Harvey Korman Is Gay
17. You Fucking Freak
18. Theme From Three's Company
19. Jeanine Jizm Is A Freak
20. Everyone In Anal Cunt Is Dumb
21. I Just Saw The Gayest Guy On Earth
22. Johnny Violent Getting His Ass Kicked By Morrisey
23. Metamorphosis
24. I'm Sick Of You
25. Howard Wulkan's Bald
26. You're A Trendy Fucking Pussy
27. Tom Arnold
28. I Got Athletes Foot Showering At Mike's
29. Big Pants. Bigger Loser
30. Marc Payson Is A Drunk
31. Your Family Is Dumb
32. Furnace
33. You're Dumb
34. Van Full Of Retards
35. Deche Charge Are A Bunch Of Fucking Losers
36. Everyone In The Underground Music Scene Is Dumb
37. Dumb. Fat. And Gross
38. I'm Not Stubborn
39. Mike Mahan's Sty
40. 02657
41. Gloves Of Metal
42. Bonus Track

"I Like It When You Die" (1997) (thanks to yesno)

1. Jack Kevorkian Is Cool
2. Valujet
3. You've Got No Friends
4. You Keep A Diary
5. You Own A Store
6. You Got Date Raped
7. Recycling Is Gay
8. You're A Cop
9. You Can't Shut Up
10. You've Got Cancer
11. We Just Disagree
12. Hungry Hungry Hippos
13. You Are An Interior Decorator
14. Pottery's Gay
15. Rich Goyette Is Gay
16. Branscombe Richmond
17. You Live In Allston
18. You Are A Food Critic
19. Just The Two Of Us
20. Your Band's In The Cut-Out Bin
21. You're Gay
22. You Look Adopted
23. Your Cousin Is George Lynch
24. You Have Goals
25. You Drive An IROC
26. You Play On A Softball Team
27. Because You're Old
28. You Sell Cologne
29. Being A Cobbler Is Dumb
30. You Live In A Houseboat
31. Richard Butler
32. 311 Sucks
33. Your Kid Is Deformed
34. You Are An Orphan
35. You're Old (Fuck You)
36. You Go To Art School
37. You're Best Friend Is You
38. You're In A Coma
39. Windchimes Are Gay
40. No, We Don't Want To Do A Split Seven Inch With Your Stupid F@#king Band
41. Rene Auberjonois
42. The Internet Is Gay
43. Ha Ha, Your Wife Left You
44. Hootie And The Blowfish
45. You Went To See Dishwalla And Everclear (You're Gay)
46. Locking Drop Dead In McDonalds
47. Technology's Gay
48. Your Favorite Band Is Supertramp
49. I'm In A.C.
50. You (Fill In The Blank)
51. Kyle From Incantation Has A Mustache
52. Bonus Track #3

"Picnic Of Love" (1998) (the album that lets you know it's all in the name of comedy and not hate)

1. Picnic Of Love
2. I Respect Your Feelings As A Woman And A Human
3. I Wanna Grow Old With You
4. Saving Ourselves For Marriage
5. Greed Is Something That We Don't Need
6. I'm Not That Kind Of Boy
7. I Couldn't Afford To Buy You A Present (So I Wrote You This Song)
8. I'd Love To Have Your Daughter's Hand In Marriage
9. My Woman, My Lover, My Friend
10. Waterfall Wishes
11. In My Heart There's A Star Named After You

"It Just Get Worse" (1999)

1. I Became A Counselor So I Could Tell Rape Victims They Asked For It
2. Easy E. Got A.I.D.S. From F. Mercury
3. I Like Drugs And Child Abuse
4. Laughing When Leonard Peltier Gets Raped In Jail
5. I Convinced You To Beat Your Wife On A Daily Basis
6. I Sent Concentration Camp Footage To Americas Funniest Home Videos
7. Rancid Sucks (And The Clash Sucked Too)
8. I Paid J. Howell To Rape You
9. I Pushed Your Wife In Front Of The Subway
10. Extreme Noise Terror Is Afraid Of Us
11. You Rollerblading Faggot
12. I Sent A Thankyou Card To The Guy That Raped You
13. I Lit Your Baby On Fire
14. Body By Auschvitz
15. I Intentionally Ran Over Your Dog
16. Sweatshops Are Cool
17. Woman, Nature's Punching Bag
18. I Snuck A Retard In To A Sperm Bank
19. Your Kid Committed Suicide Because You Suck
20. I Ate Your Horse
21. Hitler Was A Sensitive Man
22. You Robbed A Sperm Bank Because You're A Cum Guzzling Fag
23. I Made You're Kid Get AIDS, So You Could Watch It Die
24. I Fucked Your Wife
25. Into The Oven
26. I Gave Nambla Pictures Of You Kid
27. The Only Reason Men Talk To You Is Because They Want To Get Laid, You Stupid Fucking Cunt
28. I Made Fun Of You Because Your Kid Just Died
29. Domestic Violence Is Really Really Really Funny
30. Dictators Are Cool
31. Deadbeat Dads Are Cool
32. I'm Really Excited About The Upcoming David Buskin Concert
33. Being Ignorant Is Awesome
34. You're Pregnant, So I Kicked You In The Stomach
35. Chris Barnes Is A Pussy
36. Tim Is Gay
37. B.T./A.C.
38. I Sold Your Dog To A Chinese Restaurant
39. I Got An Office Job For The Sole Purpose Of Sexually Harassing Women

"Defenders Of The Hate" (2001)

1. All Our Fans Are Gay
2. Limp Bizkit Think They're Black, But They're Just Gay
3. You Were Too Ugly To Rape, So I Just Beat The Shit Out Of You
4. Hebosaurus
5. Even Though You're Culture Oppresses Women, You Still Suck You Fucking Towelhead
6. If You Don't Like The Village People, You're Fucking Gay
7. Obviously Adopted
8. Walker, Texas Corpse
9. The Word Homophobic Is Gay
10. You Converted To Judaism So A Guy Would Touch Your Dick

Several years ago I saw A.C. at ABC No Rio (tiny punk community center on the Lower East Side of New York.) After the show, we were going to a bar with some of the band, when a guy across the street in a bright orange suit whom I'd never seen before in my life started calling my name, yelling "YOU LEFT YOUR DICTIONARY AT MY HOUSE!"

I tried to ignore him, but I have a pretty unusual name, so it was hard to pretend he was calling somebody else. I explained to my compatriots that I didn't, as far as I knew, know the guy, and that my dictionary was safely in place on my own bookshelf. On hearing this, Seth the vocalist started pulling bottles out of a nearby trash can and flinging them pretty hard at Mr. Orange, who sensibly enough turned tail and ran. The evening proceeded apace; we remained unmolested, and a rollicking good time was had by all, thanks to that spontaneous outburst of violence.

Anal Cunt are a noisecore band out of Allston, MA. Their current lineup is:

• Seth Putnam: Vox, keyboards
• Josh Martin: Guitar
• Nate Lineham: Drums

Their music pretty much sounds like a vacuum cleaner running while stuff falls down the stairs, and dad is in the next room being murdered. If you're like me, most of A.C.'s appeal lies in their truly bizarre (and often offensive) song titles (as noted above).

During the summer of 2000, I saw Anal Cunt perform at the Middle East in Cambridge. It certainly wasn't the best concert I'd ever been to, and I certainly didn't have the best time, but it was "interesting."

The room was full of sort of dirty hardcore types, drunk and rowdy. Cool. That bit was fine. Until two 300+ pound men started moshing. Scary as hell.

Before A.C. started playing, Seth put on a swastika armband and led the crowd in a rousing "Heil Hitler!" Yeah. Some of the crowd were genuinely into it -- you could just tell -- and some of us just laughed. There were some who were offended. Come on, you're at an Anal Cunt concert for fuck's sake.

Seth was clearly wasted, and continued to swig from a bottle during the entire set. He offered someone $5 to punch the guy next to him. Someone else stopped him before he could slug the guy. Then, he asked another guy, standing at the foot of the stage, if he could kick him in the face.

Seth: Can I kick you in the face?
Guy: (laughing) Yeah, sure.
Seth: Seriously, do you want me to fucking kick you in the fucking face?
Guy: (drunk and brave) Go ahead.

Seth kicks the guy in the face. Hard.

Guy: (drunk and angry) Fuck you! You fucking asshole! Fuck you!
Seth: You asked for it, asshole. Here's $10.

Seriously. Fucking crazy as hell. Later in the set, Seth vomited while he was singing. He kept singing. I can't say that I ever want to go to another Anal Cunt show, but I'm certainly not sorry that I went to this one. Besides, it made me feel like a badass just being there.

A.C. is getting to be one of my favorite bands. Although I'm not sure what that says about me. I love how they got kicked off Earache records after they released It Just Gets Worse because of record stores refusing to carry the album due to its highly offensive nature. I have read many a review of said album, and all have deemed it the most offensive thing ever recorded. I am proud to own a copy. The band has said that their next album will only be worse than before. I think we have a lot to look forward to.

I recently got the chance to see Anal Cunt play in Memphis. They played in the basement of a coffee shop/deli type place downtown. The place had brick walls and concrete floors and was illuminated only by two lightbulbs hanging from the ceiling by the wires that powered them.

The show was the most intense thing i have ever heard. The band opened with the warmest of greetings: "We're Anal Cunt, and you are all a bunch of FAGGOTS!!!". Immediately they went right into playing and didn't let up for nearly half an hour. What sounded like one huge jumble of noise to some people was merely a medley of their best and most popular work. Songs like "311 Sucks", "Rancid Sucks (And the Clash sucked too)", and "You're Gay" (dedicated to 'The fat fucking kid in the Acid Bath shirt'), along with their infamous cover songs, including but not limited to: Elton John's "I'm Still Standing", The Bee Gees' "Stayin' Alive", and Hootie and the Blowfish's "Only Wanna Be With You" made the evening as entertaining as ever. There were some reservations about the skinheads beating the shit out of each other, but once everyone realized they were just having a good drunken time, the crowd got back into it.

All in all, it wasn't the best show I've ever seen, but if given the chance, I'd see them again. They are definitely a must for followers of this genre. I mean how can you go wrong with a song like "If You Don't Like The Village People, You're Fucking Gay"?

Update: As of Dec. 21, 2001, Anal Cunt have broken up. The members have since formed several new bands, most notably You're Fired, and Full Blown A.I.D.S.. God, and I thought Anal Cunt was a pretty offensive band name......

Original writeup by our beloved taschenrechner who has decided to leave us. He bequeathed this writeup to me as a birthday present and also because I went to the glorious A.C. show with him. If you got a problem with it, I am sorry that you care that much. But feel free to msg me anyway!