It's strange to see the
sunrise after years of not waking until (at LEAST) 11:00am. I've generally been sort of a
night owl for a long time. This is not by choice, but is dictated to me by my mixed up internal clock. It worked out well for me once I got to college and didn't have to go to school at 7:00am. I could get up at a reasonable hour, go to
class and
work evenings. However, I have finally
crossed over into complete shadow.
I started working night shift full time this week and I feel darker then I have at any other time of my life. I am a CNA at a nursing home so on my shift I get to see 70-100 year old women at there absolute worst; you know hair a matted mess in the back, night gown tangled, wet with sweat and urine and needing to be changed or to use the bedpan. It's got to be uncomfortable and embarrassing to them because I know it's no barrel of fun for me.
All in all it's not an awful job. I get paid well with benefits and I have my days to myself. However I always have that wierd sleepy feeling (you know the one you get when you've slept too much) that I can't seem to shake even though I sleep about as much as I did before I started this shift. I can't seem to shake the whole "I'm becoming a vampire" feeling. I keep having dreams of being "born into darkness". I've also started becoming obsessed with vampire and other dark gothy movies. I'm actually not even a goth, but I feel that sick sweet feel of death pulsating though my muscles and bones.
Maybe it's time I went vegan...just to be on the safe side.