There was
something I realized today on the drive home from work, something I wanted to
write here in this day log, actually. But I've
forgotten what it was.
I find it amusing, and
pretty cool, really, that I spend so much time on here all of a sudden. That I read people's
write ups and I write my own, sharing our lives and our thoughts and our days with
each other. That
we're anonymously sharing our lives with each other and it's strangely comforting. I used to be so self conscious of my thoughts,
disliking the idea of displaying them to all the world to see. Now I just
don't give a damn. If people don't like me, they don't like me. At least I can give them the chance to
know me.
Damn, I was getting a hold of the realization I came to today, but I momentarily became distracted by
the sound of dishes being put away downstairs that it has escaped me.
Since I've been back in town things have been
different. I have been different. Happier, more easy going, I think.
Random people on the street never used to say hello to me but now dozens of them say hello and
talk to me out of nowhere as I walk down the street, go up the
elevator, whatever. It amazes me everytime. It's not that the people have changed, it's that
I have changed. Perhaps my whole
aura has changed, that I'm no longer
enclosed within myself, ignoring all around me and wishing to be left alone.
I smile sometimes when I walk by myself, I don't care. I smile at people and I feel happy with the world.
I'm okay when everything is not okay. I'm happy that I'm so sad, that I'm so miserable. That I'm so
anything. It makes me smile that life is so damn livable. I don't know how else to put it.
It's good to be alive.
I can walk alone.